Fangala the Flying Feline

Wow, shocking. This is certainly one of the more unusual poems out there, and I must say, you pulled it off quite nicely. It's free verse, but it flows like ...

Uh... I don't think the cookie analogy works. Sorry, but I don't see how mixing a bowl of cookie dough relates to life, but maybe I'm just not in a ...

BBB rocks the writing world yet again! Like I said in my last review, this story is beautifully daring. It's impossible to NOT feel for your character. I also like ...

Oh joy, this was brilliant. Normally I don't like violently non-cliche fantasy, but you pulled it off effortlessly. Not only was it fun and fast-paced, you've also got a perfect ...

It was good. I think you can cut this down a lot , and watch your questions marks and exclamation points. Opening with an exclamation was brilliant, but that's the ...

Very sweet. I agree with everybody that you could expand on this; maybe you could change it into a series of short stories? But not only that--this part can be ...

Wow, dark. I'm glad she doesn't die; that would be really awful. This was very well-written and gripping, and my only suggestion is more concrete detail and less direct exposition. ...

Hurray, I'm back! Sorry I haven't posted anything for ages, but now that I've finally returned, guess who's the first person's portfolio I check? That's right, BBB, it's yours! Now, ...

Sweet. I agree that it's a bit short, and I'm not sure I like the rhyme at the end. This might go over better if it was free verse, since ...

Pretty nice. You do say "hole" a lot, though. I'm sure you can find another word for that. Also, the first few verses are repetitive. Like: "I am in a ...

Hi, there. Okay, I agree with cat4prowl about your info-dumpish first part. It would be much better if you started off with an action scene. As is, it resembles an ...

AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH! Why is this post so short? Write more! Sorry, I got a little carried away there. Anyway, this is good...very good. Dumb librarian sub. :D I'll be looking out ...

Ah...very good. Overall, great job writing as a girl. However, can I beg you to change Brittany's name? Oh God...that name makes me gag. No offense to anyone with that ...

Ha, this was marvelous! I have such a great mental picture of your narrator (singer?), like he's going completely insane. That's what crazy people do--they focus on something unimportant, but ...

Very nice. I actually felt the exhilaration of free-falling while reading this. Some of the lines could be stronger (like Kalliope pointed out), but other than that, this was extremely ...